D&D Humor

[JadedDM]

Overly Cautious D&D Party Still in Starting Tavern after 10 Sessions

Man, I've been there.

[Lukafio]

After reading that, it felt something like this to me. LOL

[JadedDM]

Here's another:

Millennials Playing D&D Confused by Concept of Long Rest

It's funny because it's devastatingly true.

[Lukafio]

Oh-My-Gawd!
Like I totally get it ... NOT!

LOL

[New Hegdeh]

I liked Order of The Stick, and there are probably others.

[Lukafio]

Stumbled across this on Twitter and thought it worth sharing here.

WIZARD: I cast Sympathy on the dragon.
DM: What does that one do again?
WIZARD: Not sure


**one minute later**
DRAGON: (sobbing) They always ask where's the dragon's hoard.
WIZARD: There, there now.
DRAGON: But they never ask WHY the dragon hoards.

[New Hegdeh]

haahahahaa

[JadedDM]

This reminds me a bit of something I saw years ago online.

PC: I open the door into the next room.
DM: You see an orc armed with a battleaxe guarding a chest.
PC: I enter into a frank and meaningful dialogue with the orc, validating his right to guard chests, but not pigeon-holing him into a stereotype, in the hopes of restructuring the traditional adventurer/monster antagonistic relationship into something more positive and mutually beneficial.
DM: Make a CHA check.
PC: I succeed.
DM: The orc is moved by your rhetoric. Casting his battleaxe aside, he sits down on the chest and invites you to join him in a brainstorming session about ways to revitalize the decaying subterranean infrastructure and society of the dungeon, perhaps with a--
PC: While he is distracted, I stab him with my sword.

[New Hegdeh]

[Lukafio]

Five things players said/did and then regretted it later.

1. Ranger wearing plate mail in a misty echoing crypt: "I try to move silently"

2. Apprentice to mage "By the way master, I finally shot that pesky owl that kept following you around."

3 .Party fighting a band of thieves in a 4X3X4m room, when the mage says, with serious tone: "Hell, I cast a fireball, THAT'll teach'em."

4. Party laying on a hillside spying on the Imperial Army of Darkness commanded by Gul the Necromancer himself (+/- 10,000 troops) "Hmmm, if we attack from the rear, do we get bonuses on our attack roll??"

5. Paladin as the lone survivor of a party of 7 facing an army of evil and undead creatures, which just slaughtered his fellow adventurers: "Huh, why should I run? I got protection from evil in a 15ft radius, THEY can't touch me" (last words).

Can anyone guess where I found this one at?